i'm feeling abit disillusioned, like i'm still living in self-denial. i felt like some wandering floating soul in sch moving from LT to LT class to class, with no fixed venue at all, omygosh, you dno how this feeling sucks for me. my class is nice u know, just that when you don't share the same interests, you have nth common to talk about so i just keep to myself most of the times or talk to yongyi or ivan. sometimes i think between friends you need chemistry which i haven't found exactly amongst the girls. perhaps my previous class was too nice too good that i cannot adapt to the current one. i thought things were going prettaye well, eating tgt as a class in the canteen, then playing tgt outside the PT until i couldn take it i realised and ran back to the 06v11 classroom alone, to see all our photos tgt. the girls in my current class do have their own cliques, and it's accord to sch apparently. i don't really mind as long as i have someone to talk to, sit with during lectures. it's okay sitting with the guys but there are still certain lines you must draw between both genders.

trng keeps me alive, and with my fellow yr ones ard, it helps me foster a stronger sense of belonging. we played against queensway yesterday and whoa i felt really small. i was super impressed with the girls, small but strong. the way they tussle for the ball, got past our defence line, played their hearts out really made me salute them. you will be amazed to actly realise their ball control might even be better than some of our players, the power of their goal kicks comparable to us even though they are really small. the best part is that they are really humble, really disciplined and how they cherish every learning experience. as for the goakeeper, she's the best i have seen so far. i have never seen any keeper braver than her, still being able to laugh even though her head got rammed so many times until her nose bled, even though we tripped over her so many times. she deflected the ball until she had to be subed out due to an excruciating pain in her leg. imba lah seriously.
i got friends today who thought little of them just because they were sec. well just don't underestimate them. look who's really small now.

thinking abt it, i don't wna let mr boy and ms low down. the teachers who have really took great pains grooming me into who i am now. not as if i'm anybody now, but still i feel that i needa do the IP proud by concentrating on what im supposed to do. basically even if i cannot integrate into the class community, then it's just too bad for me lah. i have to move on, survive lectures, do my tutorials. even if there's no one there to help me, i have to help myself and stop living in the past. they are the ones spiritually still there for me, hoping that i will still be the same old grace last time who strives to do her best in everything she does. even though she's no longer that friendly person who can get along with her classmates very well, she will stlil try to do IP proud.
dear friends, i hope you're doing well in your respective classes. my heart is always there for yall. 06v11, we are one kay.